Turning point (watch your knees!)

Oh guys, ha, ha, ha, this blog is so funny!  You know, at one point in time I considered myself a writer.  I thought I would just write, and write, and write.  I look back at this blog and see that (and many more things) that I started and let slide over the years.  I make excuses for not writing, I make excuses for not spending time to be creative.  I made so many excuses for so many years about taking the time to be fit and healthy that it is almost a joke.  I gave some real thought to throwing away what I had written in this blog previously so that it wasn't so shameful, to give myself a "fresh start", but the reality is that it is a part of my journey and that keeping it reminds me of how far I have come.

Because one day something changed.  I can't really put my finger on why that time was different.

My mom convinced me to sign up with her for a group "fitness" challenge through the local rec center.  I walked into the room for our informational meeting hearing EVERYTHING that I had already heard before.

• Drink more water
• Be more active
• Watch what and how much you eat

Blah, blah, blah.  There should have been nothing different about that Saturday in November when I started the actual challenge.  It should have been just like every other time over the past ten years I'd gotten "serious" about my health.  

I would have held on for a few days.  Maybe even a few weeks.  I would have done everything "by the books" to the point of breaking and then decided that it was stupid.  I should have quit and gone on a chocolate and cookie dough binge with my husband on the couch and decided that I would just come back to it all later.

But I didn't.  Maybe it was the feeling of competition (even against myself.)  Maybe it was the fact that so many aspects of this plan were organized with specific, daily goals.  Maybe it was the fact that I have control issues and was able to create a spreadsheet to track data over time that pushed me over the edge.  Whatever the reason, I didn't quit this time.  

Not only did I keep on top of the challenge, it got easier.  And best of all, it worked.  

I walked into the challenge that day in November with really crappy results from my last physical.  I walked into the challenge at 229 lbs (officially the most I have ever weighed) with a BMI of 35.4 and a resting heart rate in the high 70's/low 80's.  I walked out 7 weeks later at 204 lbs (an 11% decrease in weight) with a smile and the belief that I could really do this.  I could take control of my life and my health and I could decide how I would feel each day.  

I've thought a lot about what it was that "clicked" for me this time around that hadn't all of the times before.  Frankly, I wish it were something I could distill down to a simple formula so that I could share it with everyone who has had struggles with their energy and their body.  I can say that it wasn't "easy".  It was work, and a lot of it.  Most days it is still work (and some days it is work that I don't really feel like doing) but it is paying off.  

Every time I go out for a "run" and can push it a little further without creeping back to a walk to catch my breath.

Every time I look at my arms in the mirror and see the muscle definition starting to peek out from under the blanket of chub it has been hiding under for years.

Every time one of my kids asks to go on a walk or do one of my exercise tapes with me, it is paying off.

And those little victories will keep me going this time.