Since I was a teenager (I am being generous here, probably since I was old enough to ask questions) I have struggled with what I want to be when I "grow up". I like lots of things. In fact, I like everything on the surface when I am first introduced to it. I've had career aspirations as wide and varied as "trapeze artist", "architect", and "classical studies expert".
Unfortunately, in spite of the fact that I love everything on the surface, I also get incredibly bored unbelievably quickly with most of it. I have started many a day, project, hobby, job with a feeling of thrill and excitement at something new. I learn the new information, I gather the new tools, and within a short span of time, all I am feeling is the "oldness" of it all. Trying to look for a way out, or something different to work on. I'm not unsuccessful at the challenges I take on, but I feel like they are unsustainable over the long term
I am some kind of change junkie, and I'm worried that it is going to be my downfall. What am I doing with my life? Why am I doing this? The length of time that I have in between burn-out periods seems like it is getting shorter and shorter. My ability to focus and stay motivated for any length of time is slowly melting away.
Like the weather in Colorado, it comes on strong with wind and snow, burying everything under a crisp white blanket. Something new comes along and it seems like a powerful and majestic expression of everything I stand for, I can visualize how amazing it will be to be like this FOREVER. Then within days (or sometimes even hours) it turns to slush, grey with magnesium chloride, turning stepping outside into a miserable exercise.
Do you think it is possible for a person to not only not know what they like, what makes them happy, but also to never be able to find out?
What do you do with yourself when it seems like every day it a midlife crisis?
